Advice
If you want any advice, ask a woman, whatever she says do very reverse of that
You sure will succeed
Happiness
There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball,
And that is to have either clear conscience, or none at all
Gratitude
Time erodes gratitude more quickly than it does beauty
Cynic
The cynic is one who knows the price of every thing and the value of nothing
Americans
Forty percent of American families own dogs, and vice versa
Small town
A small town is where you squeeze a girl and everybody sequels
Where two's company and three's a demonstration
Friends
Defend me from my friends; I can defend myself my enemies
Ur
as sweet as
GIN
as hard as
RUM
as worm as
BRANDY
as clear as
VODKA
as matured as
WHISKY
as refreshing as
BEER
u r a bar of
Friendship
A good friend is nothing but one's own reflection with just a little improvement here and there.
Home
Home is the place where, when you have to go there
They have to take you in.
Fifty
Forty is the old age of youth, fifty is the youth of old age
God
If God answers your prayers he is increasing your faith. If he delays he is increasing your patience, and he doesn't answers he knows you can handle the situation perfectly.
Innocence
There cannot be innocence in this world, not with Man in it.
Life
That's life - Always some bugger telling you what to do
There are things that have to be done and you do them and you never talk about them. You don't try to justify them. They can be justified. You just do them, then you forget it.
.... Godfather
Keeping cool
If you can keep your head when all about you are loosing theirs,
It's just possible
you haven't grasped the situation
Fool people
You can fool some of the people all the time and all the people some of the time: but you can't fool all the people all the time
Punctuality
Punctuality is the politeness of princes
Jaffrey Archer in 'Not a penny more not a penny less'
Santa Banta
Santa n Banta were feeling Happy
Happy got embarrassed and left
Woman
There is a mink, from rat on a cat
You may call a woman a kitten, but you must not call her a cat
You may call her a mouse, but you must not call her a rat
You may call her a chicken, but you must call her a hen
You may call her a duck, but you must not call her a goose
You may call her a vision, but you must not call her a sight.
Take a wife
"Come, come," said Tom's father, "at your time of life, there is no longer
excuse for thus playing the rake -
It is time you should think, boy, of taking a wife."
"Why, so it is father - whose wife shall I take?"
Everybody's business
That which is everybody's business is nobody's business
... Zaak Walton
This is a story about four people!
EVERYBODY, SOMEBODY, ANYBODY, AND NOBODY!
EVERYBODY was asked to do an important job;
EVERYBODY thought that SOMEBODY would do it,
but NOBODY did it. SOMEBODY got angry about that,
because it was EVERYBODY thought ANYBODY could do it,
but NOBODY did it, but NOBODY realized that
EVERYBODY wouldn't do it.
It ended-up that EVERYBODY blamed SOMEBODY
when actually NOBODY asked ANYBODY to do the job!
Duchess
I sat next to the duchess at tea;
It was just as I feared it would be;
Her rumblings abdominal
Were truly phenomenal
And every one thought it was me!
A Wise Old Owl
... Edward Hersey Richards
A wise old owl sat on an oak,
The more he saw the less he spoke;
The less he spoke the more he heard;
Why aren't we like that wise old bird?
Toast
For the memories of yesterday
For the haplessness of today
For the promise of all our tomorrow
A Famous Toast
Here's to the maiden of bashful fifteen,
Here's to the widow of fifty,
Here's to the flaunting, extravagant queen,
And here's to the house wife that's thrifty
Let the toast pass
Drink to the last
I'll warrant she'll prove an excuse for the glass
(From School for Scandal by Richard Brinsley Shridan)
In your life problem may start from
Haywards 2000 or Haywards 5000, but
u must take it as Royal Challenge, otherwise people will call an
OLD MONK and stick a BLACK LABEL on you.
You must fight like NAPOLEON, live like BAG PIPER, walk like
JOHNY WALKER, work till 8 PM, think like DIRECTOR'S SPECIAL
and then your life will be IMPERIAL BLUE. If you do all these things
will be an ARISTOCRAT and there will be value for your SIGNATURE